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Monday Minute 12/29/25

Updated: Dec 31

Hello all my Pickleball Joy Riders! I want to share with you the three biggest life & pickleball lessons I learned in 2025. (Next week I'll share the three biggest TECHNICAL pickleball lessons).



LESSON 1: Mental Reframes

I worked really hard to roll with the pickleball punches this year and create some mental reframes that will certainly help your game, too:


All year long I overheard the same complaints from pros ad nauseam--here are some real examples: “This trainer sucks”, “There’s no parking at the venue”, “The food is terrible”, “I got the worst draw".


And I would think to myself: that player will never be great and it has nothing to do with their technical skills. They haven’t found the ability to reframe yet. I even made a game with myself in 2025: see if I could take my most painful moments from on and off the court & find a positive construct. After enough practice, I started automatically doing this (which is REALLY freaking cool).



For long-time readers: I abandoned my old mantra of "tonight I will be in my bed" because even though it's saved me on multiple occasions, I realized after reading the "Power of Now" that it's also a negation of what is.


My new go-to mantra is: "Everything is perfect in its is-ness, because it cannot be anything other than what it already is." Translation: If something really sucks I'm ok sitting in it for awhile. Moments (good and bad) aren't meant to be suffered through. They're meant to be lived.

LESSON 2: Playing well doesn’t win you matches

I had to learn how to win on my worst day (and you should, too). I totally abandoned the notion of ever playing well in 2025 LOL. Does that sound weird? "Hope is not a viable strategy," said someone very wry. The truth is, anyone can win when they're playing well. It’s easy when it’s easy. So how do you make it look easy when it’s not? 



First, the mental side: I remind myself that slow is smooth and smooth is fast. When the match is getting out of control and the world feels like someone pressed "fast forward" you have to find a way to slow your breathing, relax your grip pressure, remove the tension from your arm and most importantly--your face. That's right, calm your facial expressions and watch your game instantly improve (sounds weird, but try it!).


Second, the technical side: In 2025 I focused on shoring up each facet of my game so that on my absolute worst day in any given category my game would still be a 5.7 (while my ceiling days could be 6.0+). I spent a week in June experimenting with my drops and nothing else. Then three days experimenting with my return of serve. For all of Q2 I tinkered with where my chin lined up inside the kitchen (yes, my chin). And I’m still experimenting with my hand & paddle tip positions as recently as two weeks ago (almost touching the paddle tip to my nose like you see a lot of top pro women do).  


For better or worse, I spent way more time drilling than playing in 2025--which I know is a luxury you may not have. I get it, who wants to drill when you barely have time to PLAY?! BUT you’d be amazed at what you can achieve by spending 15 concentrated minutes on a single, very boring shot.


Getting better starts by asking yourself this question: “how would I beat me?” I ask myself that question every day. Then I go out and drill until my answer changes. Then rinse and repeat.

LESSON 3: Why finding Mr. / Mrs. Right takes time even when you think you know what you want:

Did you know that dating algorithms don’t work? Science explains it’s because we don’t actually know what we want. We just think we do. So in my quest to find Mr. Right in 2025 I played with 7 different men and ended up with 8 mixed doubles medals! So who did I gel the most with and what can you learn from my little “black book”? LOL


I went through more men this year than I did when I was DATING men! For the past two years the PPA kept signing the guys I was supposed to play with (RIP Eric Oncins, Andre Daescu and Max Freeman LOL). Unlike Anna Bright who medaled 8 times with 6 different men on purpose, I was constantly on my heels trying to find a long-term partner. Let’s start from the beginning:


Clockwise from top left: Will Howells, Aidan Schenk, Will Sobek, Mark Dancuart, Randy Blanco, Richard Livornese


Will Howells: The class act 

I took home a gold and silver with Will Howells at the beginning of the year because his normal partner, Bobbi Oshiro, was getting married and honeymooning (thx Bobbi! LMK where to send your wedding gift). I mean, what’s there not to like about a male partner who has lightning fast hands, stays cucumber-cool under pressure and is super, super smart on the court? Ok, he didn’t really believe in long warm ups so that was the only negative there. (Huge thanks to all the pros who warmed me up when Howells was stretching—too many to list.) 


Aidan Schenk: The drop king 

At the beginning of the year I picked up Aidan Schenk, a young uber competitor who at the time was little known except for an MVP Run in a team India Challenger league (fun fact Aidan was a competitive ROCK climber prior to picking up the pb paddle).  We medaled in 2/3 events we played together this year, including a bronze in the beginning of the year and a silver at Nationals at the end of the year. The guy does not miss a drop and has a super, super high IQ for the game. Catch us exchanging a lot of sly grins on the court with each other. 


Will Sobek: The surprise 

I played with the young Czech Will Sobek who is really more of a veteran - I think he was Anna Leigh’s mixed partner when they were both just starting out. We got a Bronze medal in Cincy together and I found aggression maybe for the first time in my career on the right because Sobek didn’t initiate as much as my previous partners—and I learned on the fly to embrace that. I felt like the entire time we played all I kept doing was speeding up stupid stuff to get him killed but it kind of worked -- his first counter (usually a forehand) is amazing.


Richard Livornese: The “good on paper” 

Finally, I was supposed to find some stability with Richard Livornese and despite both of us having success independently (we both got Gold in my hometown of Newport Beach in gender doubles but got 10th place in Mixed together) and despite being on similar spiritual journeys, we could not have been a worse fit in terms of game style, strategy, execution, and on court demeanor/mentality.


Randy Blanco: Proof communication is nonverbal

Randy Blanco (the former No. 1 tennis player from Cuba and protegé of Bobbi Oshiro) and I did some damage at the APP Mesa, taking home bronze against Casey Diamond and Sophia Sewing. I couldn’t really understand his English and he couldn’t really understand my Spanish (I swear I'm fluent), which is proof that most communication truly is non-verbal, something Kristin always reminds me of with my partners. (Partners can feel your energy and your attitude—you don’t need to say a word ... so be careful what you're thinking!)


Mark Dancuart: Honorable Mention

Not one but two fourth places with Mark Dancuart (South Florida Protegé of Will Howells), including a 4th place in an extremely stacked field at the US Open — Mark was a literal joy to play with and I would play with him any day, any court, any time. I think the sky is the limit for Dancuart. 


Ok, so what are the takeaways, Jill!? 

You have to sample a LOT of different play styles to find your forever partner. Don’t discount anyone, any age, any style until you’ve tried. We are mysteries to ourselves. We really don’t know what it is we want (we only think we do) or who we will play our best with. 


The veteran who I thought I’d have the best chemistry with? Epic fail. The young hungry up and comer whose name I didn’t even know? Amazing chemistry, great results. 


I wouldn’t have met Aidan if I didn’t get dumped…so for that—thank you Max Freeman and the PPA :) 


Mixed medals from 2025:

#1 Gold w/ Will Howells at the Fort

#2 Silver w/ Will Howells at Daytona

#3 Bronze w/ Aidan Schenk at the Fort

#4: Bronze w/ Will Sobek in Cincinatti

#5: Bronze w/ Richard Livornese in Michigan

#6: Bronze w/ Randy Blanco in Mesa

#7: Silver w/ Aidan Schenk at Nationals


My most memorable on-court moment of 2025!


Have you ever purposefully dove into the kitchen to avoid getting hit by the next ball? That's what I did & it was the CRAZIEST pickleball point of my life!


If you can believe it, what makes it memorable for me wasn't the point, though. Or that it was Nationals and a chance to win a 2nd Title in a row. Or the 1,000+ spectators.


It was the color of the sky. After the point I looked up and thought, “the sky is so blue today. I cannot get over how blue the sky is.” 


I was being present to the moment--I was taking everything in, the madness of the match, the uncertainty of whether we’d win or lose, the amazing fans, the color of the sky. I loved every second of it. I was there for every second of it. I’m proud of the win but I’m more proud of the presence and the gratitude I felt just to be out there competing.


All SoCal 2-Day Camps are Sold-Out!


Thank you for the incredible support for the 2-day Newport Beach camps (formerly "Fantasy Camps")! We are sold out except for ONE LAST SPOT left in the May 30-31 camp, but we promise to add two more for June & July by next week. We still have space in beautiful HAWAII in April, Baja in October, and Cayman in December!


Have a question for Jilly B? Email us at jillybcamps@gmail.com


Xoxo,

Jilly B

 
 
 

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